I fumbled for the kitchen switches, found them, and flooded the room with enough fluorescent light to take out an appendix by. On the table was a plastic medicine-caddy, the kind that holds a week’s worth of pills. Most of those caddies are small enough to fit into a pocket or purse, but this one was almost as big as an encyclopedia. Next to it was a message scribbled on a piece of Ziggy notepaper: If you forget your 8-o’clockies, I’LL KILL YOU!!!! Doris.
“My Girl” finished and “Just My Imagination” started. I followed the music into the sickroom stench. Al was in bed. He looked relatively peaceful. At the end, a single tear had trickled from the outer corner of each closed eye. The tracks were still wet enough to gleam. The multidisc CD player was on the night table to his left. There was a note on the table, too, with a pill bottle on top to hold it down. It wouldn’t have served as much of a paperweight in even a light draft, because it was empty. I looked at the label: OxyContin, twenty milligrams. I picked up the note. Sorry, buddy, couldn’t wait. Too much pain. You have the key to the diner and you know what to do. Don’t kid yourself that you can try again, either, because too much can happen. Do it right the first time. Maybe you’re mad at me for getting you into this. I would be, in your shoes. But don’t back down. Please don’t do that. Tin box is under the bed. There’s another $500 or so inside that I saved back. It’s on you, buddy. About 2 hours after Doris finds me in the morning, the landlord will probably padlock the diner, so it has to be tonight. Save him, okay? Save Kennedy and everything changes. Please. Al
You bastard, I thought. You knew I might have second thoughts, and this is how you took care of them, right?
Sure I’d had second thoughts. But thoughts are not choices. If he’d had the idea I might back out, he was wrong. Stop Oswald? Sure. But Oswald was strictly secondary at that point, part of a misty future. A funny way to put it when you were thinking about 1963, but completely accurate. It was the Dunning family that was on my mind.
Arthur, also known as Tugga: I could still save him. Harry, too.
Kennedy might have changed his mind, Al had said. He’d been speaking of Vietnam.
Even if Kennedy didn’t change his mind and pull out, would Harry be in the exact same place at the exact same time on February 6, 1968? I didn’t think so.
“Okay,” I said. “Okay.” I bent over Al and kissed his cheek. I could taste the faint saltiness of that last tear. “Sleep well, buddy.”
Back at my place, I inventoried the contents of my Lord Buxton briefcase and fancy-Dan ostrich wallet. I had Al’s exhaustive notes on Oswald’s movements after he mustered out of the Marines on September 11, 1959. My ID was still all present and accounted for. My cash situation was better than I’d expected; with the extra money Al had saved back, added to what I already had, my net worth was still over five thousand dollars.
There was hamburger in the meat drawer of my refrigerator. I cooked up some of it and put it in Elmore’s dish. I stroked him as he ate. “If I don’t come back, go next door to the Ritters’,” I said. “They’ll take care of you.”
Elmore took no notice of this, of course, but I knew he’d do it if I wasn’t there to feed him. Cats are survivors. I picked up the briefcase, went to the door, and fought off a brief but strong urge to run into my bedroom and hide under the covers. Would my cat and my house even be here when I came back, if I succeeded in what I was setting out to do? And if they were, would they still belong to me? No way of telling. Want to know something funny? Even people capable of living in the past don’t really know what the future holds.
“Hey, Ozzie,” I said softly. “I’m coming for you, you fuck.”
I closed the door and went out.
The diner was weird without Al, because it felt as if Al was still there-his ghost, I mean. The faces on his Town Wall of Celebrity seemed to stare down at me, asking what I was doing here, telling me I didn’t belong here, exhorting me to leave well enough alone before I snapped the universe’s mainspring. There was something particularly unsettling about the picture of Al and Mike Michaud, hanging where the photo of Harry and me belonged.
I went into the pantry and began to take small, shuffling steps forward. Pretend you’re trying to find the top of a staircase with the lights out, Al had said. Close your eyes, buddy, it’s easier that way.
I did. Two steps down, I heard that pressure-equalizing pop deep in my ears. Warmth hit my skin; sunlight shone through my closed eyelids; I heard the shat-HOOSH, shat-HOOSH of the weaving flats. It was September 9, 1958, two minutes before noon. Tugga Dunning was alive again, and Mrs. Dunning’s arm had not yet been broken. Not far from here, at Titus Chevron, a nifty red Ford Sunliner convertible was waiting for me.
