The trees grew high around them, the undergrowth greener. As I pushed through, shreds of colour on a crisp-leaved succulent bush caught my eye. Strands of pastel fabric, very ragged and shapeless, translucent with damp; the remnants of Clare’s clothes, set out to dry. I hesitated, feeling awkward; but I could still feel her clinging to me in the long night, still see her, bruised and breathless, dragging herself painfully up against the wall to plant that sharp kick just where the Wolf captain felt it. The way she’d kept hold of her sanity, her strength of mind, all through this nightmare I’d accidentally wished on her – she was one hell of a special person. Even when she was just my ideal secretary, smart, efficient, loyal, I’d felt a sort of admiration for her, cool but strong, a touch protective, maybe. I’d never lost sight of how big a help she was to my career; I’d have looked after her, too. But that admiration welled up far more powerfully now; and something else with it, like the first sharp thrust of a seedling through its shell, raw and wet and unconfined, searching for shape and purpose. I saw something new in her – something of Mall …
I drew a deep unsteady breath. The air was cool and fragrant with blossoms. Maybe I’d always wanted her; but unconsciously felt I had her, in the ways that mattered. Was it just protective, that admiration, or possessive? And she – she’d felt something for me, all right; enough to get her kidnapped. Could that be why her various boyfriends never stuck around long? Because it was really me …?
Beyond the bushes there was a brief swirl of water, and in my mind she turned, basking, the sun gleaming on her flank, her outstretched arms. All those teasing ideas leaped up at the thought; old ideas, highly traditional ideas. To the victor, the spoils; none but the brave deserve the fair; that kind of thing. Not that I’d go forcing myself on her. Perhaps I wouldn’t even need to say anything; it would all just fall together. It’d be natural enough, after all, something fitting, something right. Something I’d earned; or we both had. The hell with sense; the hell with holding back. Maybe she’d been right, Mall; maybe I had been cheating myself of … something. Quietly, unhurriedly, I parted the bushes and stepped through onto the sandy fringe of the pool.
Clare was there, but not alone. With her, beneath the glassy fringes of the fall, Mall stood, naked as she was, thigh-deep in the foaming water. She stooped over Clare, arms around her, hands across her back clasping her close as Clare clasped her, her parted lips fastened on Clare’s in a deep, searching kiss. Neither woman moved; they might have been statues in a fountain, their tangling hair carved in one flowing mass of ashy gold. Neither saw me. Without the faintest idea why I took a single step forward, and my feet tangled in Mall’s clothes, shed carelessly on the sand. I turned numbly and went back into the bushes again.
Still dazed, I made my way back to my perch on the rock, and sat down with a bump. I slumped there for I don’t know how long, till I felt a shadow lean over between me and the sun. Cool hands rested lightly on my shoulders, as they often had at the office, lingering to massage away tension. Affronted, shocked, I shrugged them away, and looked up angrily as I heard Clare’s cool giggle. She met my glare with wide, amused eyes, bit gently on her knuckle and stood contemplating me for a moment, swaying lightly from foot to foot. Then when it was obvious I wasn’t going to say anything she shrugged, smiled and drifted away down the slope to another vacant patch of rock. She caught my eye as she stretched out, and smiled again. I looked away, only to find Jyp awake and regarding me with his clear eyes.
‘You’re all mad at her of a sudden. How come?’
I growled. ‘Angry? Me? Why should I be? I’m just … Jesus, I’m worried, if you must know! Still worried – about her! Drifting about like that – doing things she’d never even bloody dream of, not … Not normally.’
‘You so sure? What kind of things?’
‘Christ Jesus, man! Isn’t it obvious? I mean, look at her! Wandering
about just –
‘I’d bet that’s just exactly what she does think,’ murmured Jyp.
‘Hey, come off it! She doesn’t exactly need to pinch herself – not after booting that Wolf in the ghoolies! If she doesn’t know she’s awake, she’s off her bloody rocker!’
