“All right, hair on. Little favour to ask, that’s all. A few words need whispering, and you’re the perfect woman for the job, what with your access to the corridors of power. And also, of course, you being a force of nature, wit and beauty any red-blooded man, and no few women, would happily lend an ear to.”
“You missed a bit,” she said.
“With tremendous dress sense.” Turning his back, he examined his reflection in the mirror, winked, then smoothed his eyebrows. “You’ll have noticed a certain jaded quality about the guest list?”
“What, the yesterday’s men? I imagined you felt more comfortable among your own kind.”
“As cruel as she is beautiful. Puts me in mind of those cards you find in phone booths. It’s true, my cohort of late has been a little on the wilted side. But then my
Which was up there with Tuesday following Monday. While Judd’s history was a teeming catwalk of strange bedfellows—he would fuck a Dalek, if it was draped in scarlet ribbons—politically speaking he was now firmly among the coyote ugly, and only the desperately unshaggable would want to be seen with him in public.
“Well, feed the bloody birds,” Diana said. “You’ve been the new lot’s panto villain so long, the only surprise is they haven’t nailed you to a beanstalk.”
“Picturesquely put. You’re aware that it’s temporary?”
“We’re a democracy. All governments are temporary.”
“That would be the undergraduate answer. But what I meant was, give it a little time and the new lot, as you put it, will embrace certain realities.” Satisfied with his eyebrows, Judd turned, shot his cuffs, and leaned against the sink. “One of which is me. Electoral power is all very well, but it does tie one down to accountability and appearances and all that nonsense. After a while, you come to appreciate the quiet efficiency of influence.”
“I’m not sure that
“But you’re as aware as I am that more gets done outside the public gaze than ever passes before it. And that the bedrock of our system doesn’t shift whatever colour flag we’re flying. Like it or not, Diana, you’re walking proof that we’re all subject to forces above and beyond our nationally accepted pieties. I am—well, modesty forbids. But if not one of those actual forces, I am one of those through whom it flows.”
“You mean, you’ve whored yourself out for so long and so thoroughly, you’ve lost all sense of nationhood. I think we all know that. But do you really think a new government will revert to type quite so quickly?”
“I think they’ll swiftly appreciate that their new-found allies in the shires and the suburbs might have made a difference on election day, but they’re bugger-all use when it comes to the heavy lifting of global intercourse. For that, you need experience, a willingness to accept a certain latitude when it comes to human rights, and the mother of all address books.” If he was attempting to suppress a smirk here, he wasn’t successful. “I appreciate that those qualities aren’t necessarily trumpeted from the front bench, but they’re warmly welcomed where deals are actually done. Whether that’s a London club, a Hong Kong casino or a Dubai brothel.”
“In other words, some things never change.”
“Not even the personnel, Diana. Not in any meaningful way. A few token sink estate brats aside, the paths to power are where they always were, and lead through the same school gates. And it’s difficult to maintain a stony silence when you’re side by side at a fundraiser for the alma mater. No, I’m confident that in time, relationships will flourish, friendships blossom, and my worth as a power broker come to be valued for what it is. An indispensable national asset. But until that happy day, I find myself a little short of . . . warm welcomes. Which throws me back onto your company.”
“And that’s why we’re sharing a toilet? It’s nice to be wanted, but you’d be better off strengthening bonds with your former colleagues upstairs. At least they’re not embarrassed to be seen in your company.”
“Come come. It takes more than my presence to embarrass you. No, the only thing that might would be if it became common knowledge quite how close our relationship has been. And I’m not talking about our early-days dalliance, you understand.”
She understood.
“Which brings me to my point. Excuse me while I multitask.” He stepped to the toilet, unzipped himself, and with his back to her kept on talking. “Been following the news lately?”
“No, I generally change channel and watch
“Then you’ll know there’s dissatisfaction in certain quarters regarding the proposed UN resolution about ownership of territories in the South China Sea.”
And here it was: The second boot hitting the floor. The moment she’d known would arrive, ever since he’d told her that the money she’d spent wreaking justice on a Russian assassin had been converted from Chinese yuan.
