The next moment pandemonium broke out, with Dee pounding on the window with both fists, screaming all the while, then giving it such a hard push that it flew open, and before long she was actually climbing into the office and tackling Gladys!
Brian, who clearly hadn’t expected this, for a moment just stood there staring at the two ladies, but then finally sprang into action, trying to stop one of his mistresses from murdering the other one.
The screaming had only intensified, and was now accompanied by Brian hollering at the top of his lungs for Dee to stop, and since Gladys had been lying on top of the desk when Dee came upon them, that desk now toppled over and crashed to the floor, along with plenty of files, a portrait of Brian and his family smiling at the photographer in a picture of the perfect family, and other knickknacks a retirement home general manager collects throughout his fifteen-year tenure. Even Churchill couldn’t take the strain, and leaped from his perch, almost landing on Brian’s foot!
The other door now swung open, and a bevy of residents appeared, amongst whom Harriet recognized Gran, Scarlett, Liz Murphy, Bob Sankiewicz and a good many others, all jostling to take a closer look at what sounded like a massacre.
“I think Brian is in trouble,” said Brutus dryly.
“Big trouble,” Harriet agreed.
20
Vesta had been on her way to check something on the bulletin board when the sounds of some kind of hullabaloo reached her ears. Along with what looked like the entire Happy Home population, she made her way in the direction of the source of the noise. It turned out to come from Brian’s office, and once someone had managed to open the door and take a look inside, she was of course in the first row, having a great view of the scene as it played out in front of her.
Brian was standing there in his underwear for some reason, and in front of him Dee and Gladys were pulling each other’s hair and rolling on the floor. A bust had fallen from a great height, or so it seemed, for it had made quite a dent in the nice parquet floor, and the desk had been overturned. Behind the wrestling duo and the general manager in a state of undress, Vesta could see Harriet and Brutus, looking back at her with surprise written all over their faces.
“What’s going on?” asked Liz, who had materialized next to her and who, judging from the way she was panting heavily, must have been running.
“I think it’s pretty obvious what’s going on,” said Vesta. “Dee and Gladys Judder are fighting for the dubious privilege of calling themselves Mrs. Brian Brooks.”
“Good God,” said Liz as she emitted a shocked chuckle. “Wait till I tell Bill. He’ll never believe me. When I told him that Brian was cheating on his wife not with one but two different women, he said I was delusional.”
“You’re not delusional, you’re psychic,” said Vesta. “How did you know?”
“Oh, everybody knows everything about everyone around here,” said Liz with a throwaway gesture of her hand. “Apart from bingo, gossip is our favorite way to pass the time.”
“And that murder club of yours, of course,” said Vesta, who hadn’t forgotten.
“So have you had time to think about it?” asked Liz. “It’s a lot of fun, let me tell you. And we always get our guy, since he’s already been caught.”
But before Vesta could respond, suddenly a heavy hand landed on her shoulder, and another heavy hand landed on Liz’s shoulder, and the both of them were escorted out of the office. When she looked up, it turned out that it wasn’t a vice they were caught in, but the hands of Desmond Palka.
“Out,” said the thickset nursing assistant. “And stay out.”
And to prove to them he wasn’t choosy who he picked on, he went back in there and managed to remove no less than two dozen residents from Dee and Brian’s office, and close the door in their faces. He then took up a position as sentinel, crossing a pair of burly arms in front of his chest, tilting his chin, and giving themthe no-nonsense look of a professional bouncer.
“Spoilsport,” said Liz as they started removing themselves from the scene. “Ever since we arrived here that man has given us nothing but grief.”
“But I get now why Brian doesn’t fire his ass,” said Vesta. “He’s very loyal, isn’t he?”
“Oh, he is. He would take a bullet for that man—though don’t ask me why. Brian doesn’t deserve it. He’s a horrible person.”
“Brian is a horrible person?”
“Oh, absolutely. He overcharges us, and puts the money in his own pocket.”
“He does, does he?”
“Of course. He’s making bank on what we are paying him, and only a small percentage of that money is spent on us, the people it’s supposed to be spent on!”
“But isn’t there some kind of inspection system that keeps an eye on places like these?”
“I’m sure if there is, he’s got them in his pocket,” Liz assured her.