Her mom had never, for instance, exchanged more than a few words with her cats, and even then the conversations had mainly revolved around typical topics that historically interest the feline species: food and shelter. They hadn’t spent time philosophizing about more important topics, the way Max was wont to do.
The big blorange cat was a special kitty, that much was obvious. And now he was struggling with a subject that baffled even most humans. It certainly baffled her.
Finally she decided to call a helpline, and moments later was on the phone with her friend Scarlett, the other half of the very popular Dear Gabi column.
“So Dooley wants to know if he’ll ever find love?” said Scarlett.
“Actually Max and Dooley both,” said Vesta. “But of course Max is too proud to actually come right out and admit that he’s been struggling with this.”
“I don’t know, Vesta,” said Scarlett. “It’s a tough one. Is there one mate out there for every cat? I would think not. I mean, I don’t even believe there’s one mate out there for us, so I’m sure the same thing applies to our pets, right?”
“Yeah, I guess,” she said. “But we can’t possibly tell that to Dooley. He’ll be devastated, the poor thing. Or Max. He always thinks and feels about things so deeply, he wouldn’t like your answer, prosaic though it might be. I think there’s only one thing to do,” she added, with thekind of resolve so typical for her.
“And what is that?” asked Scarlett.
“We have to find a mate for Dooley. And Max, too.”
Scarlett let out a yelp of surprise.“Vesta Muffin, you are crazy!”
“It’s the only solution! If we’re going to prove to them that there really is love out there, we have to find that love.”
“How are we going to find a mate for Max and Dooley? It’s impossible!”
“Oh, I don’t know. I’m sure we’ll think of something.”
“You mean, like a dating app for pets?”
Her jaw dropped a few inches, and by the time she had reeled it in again, like a drawbridge, her mind was already buzzing with the implications of her friend’s suggestion. “Of course!” she cried. “Tinder for pets! Why didn’t I think of that!”
“Because pets don’t have bank accounts, so they can’t pay for a phone?”
“Yeah, but still. It’s a pretty good idea. One of your very best, I must say.”
“Gee, thanks, hon. But how are you going to work it?”
“How arewe going to work, you mean? We’re in this together, sweetie. You and me are going to revolutionize the dating world. And it’s going to make us rich beyond our wildest dreams! I mean, who doesn’t want an app like that?”
“I honestly think pets can take care of their dating life all by themselves, just like they have for thousands of years. They don’t need an app to find a mate.”
“I know, but some do, and Max and Dooley are a case in point. Just like some humans get married straight out of high school or college, and some hit their thirties or forties and still haven’t found the one. No, this is big, hon. Mega.”
“If you say so.”
“I mean, how many pets are out there? Billions? Trillions?”
“So?”
“So that’s how big the market is! Do you know how often you get an idea that nobody has ever had before? Never!”
“I guess,” said Scarlett dubiously. “Okay, so I have to go now. I’ve got an appointment at the nail salon. But let me know how you want to do this, all right?”
“Your grandnephew.”
“Kevin? What about him?”
“He needs to create this app for us.”
“Oh, Vesta, I don’t know.”
“It’ll launch him in business straight out of the gate! He’ll be the new Bill Jobs, Mark Gates and Steve Zuckerberg all rolled into one!”
“I think you’ve got your names mixed up there, hon.”
“I don’t care. Just ask him. I’m sure he’ll be super-excited.”
“His mom did tell me she’s starting to worry about him. He still hasn’t chosen a major, and now it looks as if he might not go to college at all.”
“Consider this his college application. When they see what he accomplished with Pettr, they’ll be crawling all over each other to sign him up!”
“Pettr?”
“Just thought of it. Sounds great, no?”
“Uh-huh.”
“I thought so. I’ll call you.”
“Not if I call you first,” Scarlett quipped, then rang off.
CHAPTER 5
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I’d been giving the matter of Dooley’s love life—or lack thereof—some more thought, and finally saw I’d made a mistake in asking Gran for advice. When you want advice on how to cook a decent meal, who do you go to? Rachel Ray, right? Or Bobby Flay. Not Tex Poole, for instance, or Uncle Alec, whose idea of getting a good meal is visiting the frozen foods section at his favorite supermarket. So why go to Gran for advice about love? Gran’s dating life is notoriously patchy, so getting advice from her about love is like getting fitness advice from a couch potato.
So that’s why I decided to approach the one person I knew was in a successful and happy relationship: our very own Odelia!
And she just happened to arrive when I’d finally reached that conclusion. She walked in pushing the stroller, lifted Grace from the device and placed her on the kitchen counter for some reason, making strange noises all the while.
