Lily’s eyes locked with mine, and I read the sadness there. More than anything, I wanted to reach out, pull her into a hug, and do whatever it took to make that look go away.
“I picked up the phone and called my mom’s cell number. I needed to hear it from her. Of course, she didn’t answer, so I left a message. Ben told me everything would be okay, that Mom and Dad just needed to work some things out, and she would be home soon.
“I fell into bed but just stared at the ceiling. The next day, I refused to go to Sharon’s house because I wanted to be home when Mom came back. We had a little hill at the entrance to our subdivision, and I waited there for her. Each night my dad would drive home and find me sitting there, waiting.
“I would go with him and ask him a million questions, but all he would tell me was that she’d be home soon. It made no sense to me that I couldn’t talk to Mom on the phone. I must have left what seemed like a hundred voicemails until it became full. Then, two weeks later, her cell number no longer worked.
“Sharon finally had had enough and made me come over to her house for the weekend. She said I needed to get my mind off my mom leaving and have a little fun. Her parents let us watch HBO until all hours of the night; I fell asleep in their family room with Sharon. She had her arms wrapped around me, and I felt safe and at last got a good night’s sleep. I think they were all relieved that I seemed to be my old self,” she said.
She looked at me a crazed expression.
“I fooled them. This time I was the liar. I stepped out onto their front porch, and when the door closed, I began to scream. I threw a tantrum, stomping my feet and shaking my fist at the sky. And I screamed and screamed and screamed. I couldn’t stop.
“I’d gone out front because my dad was there to pick me up. He ran from the car and tried to wrap me in his arms, but I struggled and kept screaming. No one would tell me where my mom was. Mr. Riley came out and wrapped both my dad and me into a hug to try to hold me.
“Someone called 911, and soon the paramedics were there. I heard one of them tell my dad and Mr. Riley to hold me still. The last thing I remember was looking up as they placed me on the gurney, and then whatever they had stuck me with finally worked and everything went dark.
“I woke up in the hospital and found they’d restrained me. My dad looked like a different person. He was broken, and his face was tear-stained. I called to my dad, but my throat felt like I’d swallowed ground glass. I must have made a croaking sound because he looked up. He told me everything was going to be better. It was just another lie.
“They made me stay in the hospital for three days. The hospital assigned me a counselor who would make home visits, but she just made it worse. When she told my dad she thought I needed to be put on drugs, he ended my sessions.
“It was Sharon who finally told me what happened. My mom had taken off with a man she worked with. Mom had told me how much she loved me the morning she left. They all lied to me.
“I guess it isn’t hard to figure out how I got into drinking and doing drugs. I was confused and hurt, and no one would tell me the truth. To this day, I have no idea where my mom is.”
“Do you want to know?” I asked.
“No. If Mom cared for me, she would’ve contacted me by now. The day you saved me was a turning point. I decided that if I continued, I might not be as lucky the next time. Then you finally came home from the summer, and you and your friends accepted me. You don’t know how much that meant to me,” she said, and then got up and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek.
And then she smiled.
“I let myself be sad one day a year now. It reminds me I’m lucky to have friends who are honest with me and care about me.”
“I didn’t know you had a brother.”
“Ben is six years older and is finishing up his master’s in engineering at the University of Michigan. He already has a job offer from an auto-parts manufacturer. I guess I’ve seen him eight times since Mom left. I just wish I’d been old enough to leave like he did.”
“Are you going to be okay?” I asked.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I love you even more for taking the time to listen to me. It felt good to talk about it and not feel like I was being judged.”
“I love you, too,” I said as we hugged again.
It wasn’t just words; I realized I loved Lily like a sister. It made me feel privileged that she would share her darkest story with me.
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