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ANNA: I ask you, what divorce?

ELLEN (she wants to keep Anna talking. Now a much more confidant tone): Listen! He has thought about a divorce for a long time. He hasn’t been able to decide, and then this evening he said, “Many can’t divorce their grandmothers, but I’ll try to night”. What do you say about that?

ANNA: What grandmother?

ELLEN: That’s what he calls… y… his wife…grandmother…

ANNA: Why?

ELLEN: She is older than him…

ANNA: You think so?

ELLEN: I know. He told me. She has terrible medical problems. She hurts and complains all the time. He is so funny when he mimics her, “Here I hurt… there I hurt.” She doesn’t have one organ that’s not in pain. She is so pathetic…

ANNA: OK! Why’s he talking to you about a divorce?

ELLEN (confidently trying to keep the conversation going): And not just this… There is no car accident on the whole road, none!

ANNA: What more did he tell you?

ELLEN: Lots…I don’t remember all… (Pause)… Hello, are you still there? Ah

… she doesn’t give him any slack. Every night she meets him at the door he has to report details of the whole day, where he was, what he did…he comes to me, discouraged…and has to lie down.

ANNA: What else does he say?

ELLEN: Oh, I remember… (Laughs). She has one leg shorter than the other… He showed me how she walks like, a lame duck. I die laughing…

ANNA (stifling tears): Why are you so…

ELLEN: I’m almost to your house, “Mrs. Mike”. I kept you talking so my new police GPS could show me the way.

ANNA: The door is locked!

ELLEN: Garage entrance…

(A young woman enters the room thru the same entrance MIKE did. She stands at the doorway looking at Anna. Anna shocked studies the sexy young woman.)

ELLEN: And… here I am! I knew it was you when you heard me say “decision”. So this is how you look! Completely different! I’m Ellen.

ANNA (confused): You look just as I thought…blond (or black hair), petite… Just the kind of woman he likes. I’m Anna…

(Ellen looks at the sleeping MIKE).

ELLEN: I see he is OK. Why did you lie to me?

ANNA: I was so shocked when his phone rang. I just said the first thing I thought of.

ELLEN: Accident! I was completely beside myself.

ANNA: Me too. You should have heard how he lied to me when he came home. He talked about a tornado causing a flood in Littleton.

ELLEN: He didn’t say anything about a divorce?

ANNA: Not a word. Just tornado and flood rubbish.

(Pause)

ELLEN: Funny…

(Pause)

ANNA: Ellen, I’m sorry for you!

ELLEN: Why?

ANNA: You are so young, so naive; you don’t understand men. You should understand the man who you might to spend your life with. You are condemning yourself to a very hard life… I’d like to warn you about your fate. You are not yet married and already you are loosing sleep because of him. Now he loves you but on some new moon he will change as he became changed to me. He will talk to another of his loves about your short leg.

ELLEN: No way, I don’t limp.

ANNA: Neither do I! He promised to talk to me about a divorce?

ELLEN: Promised…

ANNA (shrugs): He said nothing…you can’t count on him.

ELLEN: I will change him!

ANNA: I tried, but no use. And now I see that you also can’t.

ELLEN: Why are you so confident?

ANNA: He didn’t keep his promises to call you, or to talk about a divorce.

ELLEN: He was drunk.

ANNA: Yah, he was drunk, but even so he told me a very inventive story about why he was so late… It’s easier to change yourself if you are going to live with Mike.

ELLEN: Stupidity!

ANNA: Stupidity! Think a minute… first you have a husband who is smart, funny, good job. You get married, and soon this same guy is off with a new mystery woman.

ELLEN: Mystery woman?

ANNA: It happens in a group of friends or at a party. He finds another woman, young or older, pretty or ugly it doesn’t matter! (Pause) He just needs a new mystery to court, talk up, dance, somewhere in a dark corner, to kiss. And he pays no attention to his wife…

ELLEN: And his wife?

ANNA: She is in a circle of friends, must smile, chat, and look like everything is normal, except for the stark white in her cheeks. When it’s time to go home, then he talks to her; he will just stay a little longer. The wife goes home. She can’t sleep. The house makes noises, she has never heard before.

ELLEN: And the husband?

ANNA: He comes home at four AM. Brought home by somebody else…

ELLEN (shouting): Why are you telling me all this?

ANNA: I’m asking you if you want to go thru everything that I go thru, with Mike?