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JULIE: Out on your own you must know how expensive coffee has gotten… I cooked what ever you asked for, baked potatoes, boiled potatoes, macaroni and cheese, cheese burgers…

MIKE (smiling); Ya, but your salads could never come up to restaurant level…, of course, you certainly did try.…

JULIE (offended): Can your Rita make a salad like Locke-Ober’s?

MIKE: Rita and I go out to restaurants a lot…

JULIE (sadly): We hardly ever ate out at fancy restaurants at the end…

MIKE: (peaceful): Julie, honestly you cook better than restaurants…

(Pause)

JULIE: You know what hurt me most, when we separated?

MIKE: What?

JULIE: The antique coffee table… You grabbed it from in front of the TV. And I never even fought for it…

MIKE: But, I bought it.

JULIE: With my money.

MIKE: No. I paid with my money.

JULIE: You bought this sofa with your money too?

MIKE: Why do you so begrudge me the coffee table?

JULIE: We sat here on this sofa, watched TV… ate at the table… and drank wine, talked… How I have dreamed… to sit together and talk peacefully… Like before…

MIKE: And I come to you in peace… (Joyful): Julie, better remember what good times we had too! Our cruise to Caribbean, the cast party on Fred’s boat! Beautiful sunrise! Sunset! We tangoed all night…I remember it so clear…

(Mike jumps from the sofa begins to tango. He bows and invites Julie to dance, but Julie waves her hands, refusing to dance. Mike sits on the sofa again closer to Julie)

May be you don’t believe me, but now I don’t want anything… I only need a bit of your help…

JULIE (suspiciously): Why are you so happy?

MIKE: I finally got a gig!

(Mike moves a tad closer to Julie)

JULIE: Who needs a 65 year old actor even if he has lots of awards?

MIKE: TV ads!

JULIE: You are kidding!

MIKE: Not at all… Remember, when I was younger I was in beer ads with Fred? Well. Fred is now a director and he found a good show for me…

(Julie looks doubtful):…

MIKE (continuing): Such a handsome distinguished actor, as me, is in a soap opera! Soaps make a lot by using products that pay when products are used on the show. There’s a younger market to be cultivated, but some things older people use too…

Julia: Like?

MIKE: For instance, uggs, bling, pugs, fossil… Viagra!

JULIE (moving further away exclaims): Viagra! Mike, why Viagra?…

MIKE: I had no choice… Don’t forget, I’m older…I’m in good company. They’re getting older sports figures, and fighters… Well known people, to hawk Viagra in short ads, but I’m going to do a couple of Soap segments!

JULIE: Can I see it?

MIKE: Na. Not yet… Later…

JULIE: How can a Viagra script be long enough for a Soap segment?

MIKE: (low serious voice moves a bit closer to Julie) Well, there are four separate steps… First, we see the guy buying a special trademark casual shirt and slacks, there are laughs as he flirts with the sales girl to get in the mood… Then home, we see him using a branded hair preparation that dyes white hair dark and…then he shaves with a branded razor… then mouthwash and under arm… and so on, and so on.

JULIE: Ok! OK!… OK! Men are a good new market, I suppose.

MIKE: Ya! Then on the street… The guy buys a big bouquet of flowers… and walks along singing a jaunty tune. Like a hit from the sixties.…

(Mike sings something from the Beatles: “I need you, I need you, I need you…” and walks smartly around smiling. He then abruptly sits down but closer yet to Julie and continues gaily)….

MIKE: Next: we see him going to his girl friend, and giving her the flowers.… He chats and has to go to the bathroom. In her bathroom he looks in her medicine cabinet, lots of laughs here… and uses her tooth brush… lots of laughs… and picks out a branded tooth paste. He then takes her glass and fills it with water, and swallows the Viagra.

(Julie with suspicious look, moves quite far away)

JULIE: Uh…Huh… go on…

MIKE: Some more chatter… Then they sit on the sofa and watch TV…

JULIE: And then?

MIKE: He has to talk her up for awhile…

JULIE: I suppose we see the man jumping on the girl…

MIKE: No! No, not yet. Viagra takes 10 to 20 minutes to take effect…

JULIE: You actually put on a branded condom and have sex?

MIKE: Nah! We see only the guy putting one leg on the woman. The next scene shows him turning off the lights. And then the TV goes black…

(Pause)