A. S.
ADVERTISEMENTS
Miss Oranthy Bluggage, the accomplished Strong-Minded Lecturer, will deliver her famous Lecture on “Woman and Her Position,” at Pickwick Hall, next Saturday Evening, after the usual performances.
A Weekly Meeting will be held at Kitchen Place, to teach young ladies how to cook. Hannah Brown will preside; and all are invited to attend.
The Dustpan Society will meet on Wednesday next, and parade in the upper story of the Club House. All members to appear in uniform and shoulder their brooms at nine precisely.
Mrs. Beth Bouncer will open her new assortment of Doll's Millinery next week. The latest Paris Fashions have arrived, and orders are respectfully solicited.
A New Play will appear at the Barnville Theatre, in the course of a few weeks, which will surpass anything ever seen on the American stage. “The Greek Slave, or Constantine the Avenger,” is the name of this thrilling drama!!!
HINTS
If S. P. didn't use so much soap on his hands, he wouldn't always be late at breakfast. A. S. is requested not to whistle in the street. T. T. please don't forget Amy's napkin. N. W. must not fret because his dress has not nine tucks.
WEEKLY REPORT
Meg – Good.
Jo – Bad.
Beth – Very good.
Amy – Middling.
As the President finished reading the paper (which I beg leave to assure my readers is a
“Mr. President and gentlemen,” he began, assuming a parliamentary attitude and tone, “I wish to propose the admission of a new member – one who highly deserves the honor, would be deeply grateful for it, and would add immensely to the spirit of the club, the literary value of the paper, and be no end jolly and nice. I propose Mr. Theodore Laurence as an honorary member of the P. C. Come now, do have him.”
Jo’s sudden change of tone made the girls laugh, but all looked rather anxious, and no one said a word as Snodgrass took his seat.
“We’ll put it to vote,” said the President. “All in favor of this motion please to manifest it by saying, ‘Aye.’”
A loud response from Snodgrass, followed, to everybody’s surprise, by a timid one from Beth.
“Contrary-minded say, ‘No.”’
Meg and Amy were contrary-minded, and Mr. Winkle rose to say with great elegance, “We don’t wish any boys, they only joke and bounce about. This is a ladies’ club, and we wish to be private and proper.”
“I’m afraid he’ll laugh at our paper, and make fun of us afterward,” observed Pickwick, pulling the little curl on her forehead, as she always did when doubtful.
Up rose Snodgrass, very much in earnest. “Sir, I give you my word as a gentleman, Laurie won’t do anything of the sort. He likes to write, and he’ll give a tone to our contributions and keep us from being sentimental, don’t you see? We can do so little for him, and he does so much for us, I think the least we can do is to offer him a place here, and make him welcome if he comes.”
This artful allusion to benefits conferred brought Tupman to his feet, looking as if he had quite made up his mind.
“Yes, we ought to do it, even if we
This spirited burst from Beth electrified the club, and Jo left her seat to shake hands approvingly. “Now then, vote again. Everybody remember it’s our Laurie, and say, ‘Aye!”’ cried Snodgrass excitedly.
“Aye! aye! aye!” replied three voices at once.
