He let go of her hand and leaned back in his chair, a look of wry amusement on his face. ‘You know, I practised that speech a hundred times, and still it came out different from the way I’d intended.’
‘It came out very well, Martin,’ Liz said, touched by what he had just said. He was not the first man in her life to have understood how important her work was to her – but he was the first to swallow his disappointment, accept the way things had to be for them, and continue to offer her his love and support.
‘Thank you,’ she said, as his arms came around her and she rested her head against his shoulder. She remembered what her friend Elaine, an ex-researcher in the Service turned Hampstead housewife and mother, had once told her: ‘Life is about love and work. If neither’s right, you’re in trouble. If one’s right, you’ll probably be okay. But for a truly fulfilled life, you need them both to be in order.’
Liz could see the truth in that. It was a difficult balance and one she hadn’t so far managed to achieve. Might she be able to with this patient man who, for now at least, was prepared to put her needs ahead of his own? Martin said softly, ‘I do hate having the Channel between us. But thanks to Eurostar I can just about put up with it. I only hope you can as well.’
Liz looked at Martin. ‘Of course I can.’
Then, with a grin, she said, ‘Tell you what: let’s buy each other season tickets for Christmas.’
Dame Stella Rimington joined the Security Service (MI5) in 1968. During her career she worked in all the main fields of the Service: counter-subversion, counter-espionage and counter-terrorism. She was appointed Director General in 1992, the first woman to hold the post. She has written her autobiography and five Liz Carlyle novels. She lives in London and Norfolk.
