“They say that you take your middle finger and touch your palm,” Jocelyn said, demonstrating by bending hers until it touched her hand. “Then measure from that point to the tip of your middle finger, and that’s how long a guy is.”
I bent my finger to find the start of the measurement and then extended it. The girls’ eyes got big. I gave them a confused look.
“I’ve never measured myself. Do you do it from the top or underneath?” I asked.
“We’ve debated that,” one of the other girls said. “The consensus is that you do it from the top.”
“Oh,” I said and continued to walk to the party.
“So, is it?” Jocelyn asked.
“I’ll leave it to your imagination,” I said over my shoulder.
I was sure that before the night ended, Destiny would tell her.
At that point, the conversation turned to which was the cattiest sorority. Happily, I was no longer under the microscope. Not that they would need one, mind you.
◊◊◊
The party was just about what you would expect. The fraternity seemed loaded with a bunch of self-important pricks who thought they had to prove their value in some way. I didn’t blame the girls for getting drunk. That was the only way these guys would seem attractive.
As the night wore on and the partygoers got more drunk, I quickly realized that being sober might not be a good idea. Jocelyn and her friends were fun to dance with at first, but the last few dances I’d had to fend them off. A couple of them appeared determined to find out if my hand size did, in fact, correlate to the size of Mr. Happy. But with my sobriety, there was no chance of him taking over the body. The big brain remembered that we had a girlfriend.
I found Destiny talking to a couple of frat boys.
“I want to get going,” I said.
“Don’t worry about her. We’ll take care of her,” the one nearest me said.
Even Destiny caught the hidden meaning in that statement.
“You can’t be serious,” Destiny said as she turned on the guy.
He realized his misstep and beat a hasty retreat. His buddy left with him.
“I’m going to spend the night with Jocelyn.”
“You sure? I have a strong suspicion these guys are going to get more brazen as the night goes on,” I warned her.
“Don’t worry, Jocelyn will keep an eye on me. Go home. I had a good time tonight,” she told me.
There wasn’t much I could say to that. I simply shrugged and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
“I had a good time, too,” I said and left.
◊◊◊
Chapter 37 – Phil’s Safe Today Sunday October 30
About halfway to Chicago, I regretted inviting my little brother to the Cubs game.
“You’re all over the Internet this morning. I bet Coach Hope benches you,” Phil announced.
“What are you talking about? I didn’t do anything to cause a stir last night.”
Brook was next to me. She got her phone out and did a search on me. Well, it sucks to be me! Sometimes I forgot that as a celebrity, I should expect to be either photographed or filmed every time I appeared in public. When I hung out with my friends, it wasn’t an issue.
“I looked good in that one,” I said as I pointed at Brook’s phone.
Brook gave me a sideways look, which caused me to keep the rest of my comments to myself. The party pictures showed plenty of drinking, including photos of Destiny doing shots and drinking beer. Those brought a smile to Brook’s face because the cheerleaders had the same rules we did. If her coach saw these, Destiny wouldn’t be on the sidelines when we had our trip to St. Louis.
It irritated me a bit when Brook sent them to her coach.
“That wasn’t nice,” I said and shook my head. “What if she tells Coach Hope I was drinking, too?”
“You can talk your way out of it.”
Good to see she was looking out for my best interests.
“Oh, you’re in trouble. Here’s one of David kissing Destiny,” Phil said, turning the phone so Brook could see.
“If she breaks up with me because of your smart comments, I’m going after your girlfriend and dating her,” I warned the little knucklehead.
“I say you do it anyway,” Greg said, adding his two cents worth.
Phil looked at both of us and decided to shut up. I expected he was smart enough to recognize that Jill had a thing for me, or at least enough of a curiosity that she might stray. As much as I hated to tell him, I had little confidence that Jill hadn’t already slept around on him. I’d started believing that when Zoe called her a cheater. Zoe wouldn’t say that unless there was something more there than just flirting with me. She wasn’t one to start rumors or repeat stuff she wasn’t sure of.
I looked at Brook.
“Are you breaking up with me?” I asked as I did a little hop in my seat.
This time I left out the ‘Duke quiver,’ as I called it. The judges gave my ‘excited boy’ routine a nine out of ten.
“Did you kiss her?” Brook asked.
“I gave her one on the cheek to say goodbye. She hadn’t crossed any lines, so it was a reward for a pleasant evening,” I explained.
“Phil’s safe today,” Brook pronounced.
