Shadows of Berlin полностью

Rachel glances at him, then back at the set. A few paid performers have come on the screen to sing that Winston tastes good like a—­bop, bop—­cigarette should. She and Aaron are sharing the green damask sofa. Her penny loafers are off and her feet curled under her. Ezra is planted in his chair, one sandal missing, massaging his toes through his socks, but Daniela has encamped on the floor, braced against the sofa. She is further along than Rachel realized and will need help getting up, because her belly is now swollen to the size of the moon. Her cheeks are flushed, and her face is round. She has lost all her angles. All her edges have vanished.

“I mean, do I really need this guy telling me that Winston brought flavor back to filter cigarettes?” Aaron rants. “Do I really need that information fed into my brain?” he asks aloud. “I don’t smoke ’em and never will. I don’t care what this schmo Moore has to say on the matter.”

“My mother loves Garry Moore,” Daniela injects. “She says he’s cute as a button.”

“Okay, well…” Aaron shrugs dismissively.

“So. You don’t like the commercial shtick?” Ezra has the solution. “Close your eyes,” he suggests, still working his toes. “Stick your fingers in your ears.”

Aaron swallows, but Rachel can tell that the tension in his body is ratcheted upward. The unbearable boyish restlessness betrays itself in the flexing muscle along his jawline and the fidgeting cigarette. He bangs off ash into the ashtray they share.

The room is filled with the TV’s chatter. Rachel looks around her. Everything is comfortable in the Weinstock apartment. Comfortable in the messy way that apartments with children can be. Toys picked up and dumped into a play basket. Children’s books atop a stack of magazines. Tawny Scrawny Lion. Clever Polly and the Stupid Wolf. A basket of laundry, folded but not yet put away, tucked under the lamp table. The baby pictures in frames cluttering the wall.

Why is it so frightening for her, Aaron’s desire for a child? Perhaps it’s the same thing that frightens her so about painting. She is terrified by what might come out of her.

“Ah. See, here we go again,” Rachel hears her husband complain. “Milk of magnesia. I’m trying to watch a show, and they’re selling me milk of magnesia.”

“Shhh,” Rachel hushes. “I’m trying to hear.” Although she really isn’t listening. Someone has a secret? They’re supposed to guess? And who is Boris Karloff? Everyone seems to know but her. She expels smoke. For a while, everyone stares dutifully at the screen. Aaron sighs as if he’s constipated. His mind is so restless, he can’t simply sit and watch. It’s why he talks through movies even after people shush him. It’s why he fits so well into the restaurant business, because in the kitchen or in the dining room during the dinner rush, his brain is kicked into high gear. Sitting and watching makes him crazy. That’s the real reason they don’t have a television. Finally, the program comes to an end, and he is ready with a frown.

“I mean, we’ve been sitting here for how long, staring at this little blue screen? At least with a movie you’ve got something to look at, ya know?”

But Rachel has stopped listening to her husband’s bellyaching. She has noticed a certain expression on Daniela’s face, as if all the woman’s attention has suddenly inverted. Focused sharply inward. A knitting of the brow, slight at first but then forceful. A flatness of the line of her mouth, and then a crimp of pain. Daniela’s hand, she sees, jumps quietly to her swollen belly. Instinctively, Rachel reaches across the sofa.

“Daniela.” She pronounces the name with polite concern, touching Daniela’s arm.

“Oh boy,” Daniela whispers aloud.

Ezra glances over to her. His shoulders slump. “Sweetheart?”

“That’s a contraction,” his wife declares with a certain solid forbearance.

It’s taking too long! Telephoning the doctor, calling for a taxi, packing the suitcase that should have been packed already but wasn’t, because weren’t they supposed to have more time than this? More time before this impatient baby coming in such a crazy rush!

“The doctor’s line is busy,” Ezra reports, not panicking, just making the announcement, keeping the team informed. Tries again. “Still busy!”