‘No, not there. A little bit here.’
With that pantomime, and through the invisible hands of her niece, I finally established that the elderly woman had two painful lumps in her breast. I also learned that she experienced some pain with deep breaths, and when lifting heavy objects. I wrote a note for Doctor Hamid, detailing my second-hand observations and my conclusions. I’d just finished explaining to the girl that she should take her aunt to Doctor Hamid’s surgery at once, and give him my note, when a voice spoke behind me.
‘You know, poverty looks good on you. If you ever got really down and out, you might be irresistible.’
I turned in surprise to see Karla leaning in the doorway with her arms folded. An ironic half-smile turned up the corners of her mouth. She was dressed in green-loose silk trousers and a long-sleeved top, with a shawl of darker green. Her black hair was free, and burnished with copper tints by the sun. The green of warm, shallow water in a dreamed lagoon blazed in her eyes. She was almost too beautiful: as beautiful as a blush of summer sunset on a sky-wide stream of cloud.
‘How long have you been there?’ I asked, laughing.
‘Long enough to see this weird faith-healing system of yours in operation. Are you curing people by telepathy now?’
‘Indian women are very obstinate when it comes to having their breasts handled by strangers,’ I replied when the patient and her relatives had filed past Karla, and left the hut.
‘Nobody’s perfect, as Didier would say,’ she drawled, with a smirk that fluttered just short of a smile. ‘He misses you, by the way. He asked me to say hello to you. In fact, they all miss you. We haven’t seen much of you at Leopold’s, since you started this Red Cross routine.’
I was glad that Didier and the others hadn’t forgotten me, but I didn’t look her in the eye. When I was alone, I felt safe and satisfyingly busy in the slum. Whenever I saw friends from beyond those sprawling acres, a part of me shrivelled in shame.
‘Come in, come in. This is a real surprise. Sit… sit here, while I just… clean up a bit.’
She came over and sat on the wooden stool as I gathered a plastic bag containing used swabs and bandages, and swept the last of the litter into it. I washed my hands with spirit once more, and packed the medicines into the little rack of shelves.
She looked around the small hut, examining everything with a critical eye. As my gaze followed hers, I saw my little house for the shabby, threadbare hovel that it really was. Because I lived alone in the hut, I’d come to think of it as luxuriously spacious, in contrast to the crowding that was everywhere around me. With her beside me, it seemed mean and cramped.
The bare earth floor was cracked, and formed in lumpy undulations. Holes as big as my fist punctured every wall, exposing my life to the brawl and business of the bustling lane outside. Children peeped in through the holes at Karla and me, emphasising how unprivate my life there was. The reed matting of the roof sagged, and had even given way in a few places. My kitchen consisted of a single-burner kerosene stove, two cups, two metal plates, a knife, a fork, a spoon, and a few containers of spices. The whole of it fitted into a cardboard box, and was stored in one corner. I was in the habit of buying only enough for a single meal at a time, so there was no food. The water was stored in an earthenware matka. It was slum water. I couldn’t offer it to her because I knew Karla couldn’t drink it. My only furniture was a cupboard for medicines, a small table, a chair, and a wooden stool. I remembered how delighted I’d been when those sticks of furniture were given to me; how rare they were in the slum. With her eyes, I saw the cracks in the wood, the stains of mildew, the repairs made with wire and string.
I looked back to where she sat on the stool, lighting a cigarette and blowing the smoke out through the side of her mouth. A rush of irrational resentment seized me. I was almost angry that she’d made me see the unlovely truth of my house.
‘It’s… it’s not much. I…’
‘It’s fine,’ she said, reading my heart. ‘I lived in a little hut like this in Goa for a year once. And I was happy. There isn’t a day goes by when I don’t feel like going back there. I sometimes think that the size of our happiness is inversely proportional to the size of our house.’
