Shantaram полностью

She knocked twice, turned the knob and we entered. There was nothing in the small, square space but the carpet on the floor, lace curtains drawn across the window, and two large, flat cushions. Karla took my arm and steered me toward the cushions. The half-light of late afternoon glowed through the cream-coloured lace. The walls were bare and painted tan-brown, and there was a metal grille, about a metre square, set into one of them just above the skirting board. We knelt on the cushions in front of the grille as if we’d come to make our confession.

‘I am not happy with you, Karla,’ a voice said from behind the grille. Startled, I peered into the lattice of metal, but the room beyond it was black and I could see nothing. Sitting there, in the gloom, she was invisible. Madame Zhou. ‘I do not like to be unhappy. You know that.’

‘Happiness is a myth,’ Karla snapped back angrily. ‘It was invented to make us buy things.’

Madame Zhou laughed. It was a gurgling, bronchial laugh. It was the kind of laugh that hunted down funny things, and killed them stone dead.

‘Ah, Karla, Karla, I miss you. But you neglect me. It really has been much too long since you visited me. I think you still blame me for what happened to Ahmed and Christina, even though you swear it is not so. How can I believe that you do not hold a grudge against me, when you neglect me so terribly? And now you want to take my favourite away from me.’

‘It’s her father who wants to take her, Madame,’ Karla replied, a little more gently.

‘Ah yes, the father…’

She said the word as if it was a despicable insult. Her voice rasped the word across our skin. It had taken a lot of cigarettes, smoked in a particularly spiteful manner, to make that voice.

‘Your drinks, Miss Karla,’ Rajan said, and I almost jumped. He’d come in behind me without making the slightest sound. He bent low to place a tray on the floor between us, and for a moment I stared into the lambent blackness of his eyes. His face was impassive, but there was no mistaking the emotion in those eyes. It was cold, naked, incomprehensible hatred. I was mesmerised by it, bewildered, and strangely ashamed.

‘This is your American,’ Madame Zhou said, breaking the spell.

‘Yes, Madame. His name is Parker, Gilbert Parker. He is attached to the embassy, but this is not an official visit, of course.’

‘Of course. Give Rajan your card, Mr. Parker.’

It was a command. I took one of the cards from my pocket and handed it to Rajan. He held it at the edges, as if he was afraid of contamination, and backed out of the room, closing the door behind him.

‘Karla did not tell me, when she telephoned, Mr. Parker-have you been in Bombay very long?’ Madame Zhou asked me, switching to Hindi.

‘Not so long, Madame.’

‘You speak Hindi quite well. My compliments.’

‘Hindi is a beautiful language,’ I replied, using one of the stock phrases that Prabaker had taught me to recite. ‘It is a language of music and poetry.’

‘It is also a language of love and money,’ she chuckled greedily. ‘Are you in love, Mr. Parker?’

I’d thought hard about what she might ask me, but I hadn’t anticipated that question. And just at that moment, there was probably no other subject that could’ve unsettled me more. I looked at Karla, but she was staring down at her hands, and she gave me no clue. I didn’t know what Madame Zhou meant by the question. She hadn’t asked me if I was married or single, engaged or involved.

‘In love?’ I mumbled, the words sounding like an incantation in Hindi.

‘Yes, yes, romantic love. Your heart lost in the dream of a woman’s face, your soul lost in the dream of her body. Love, Mr. Parker. Are you in it?’

‘Yes. Yes, I am.’

I don’t know why I said it. The impression that I was making an act of confession, there, on my knees before the metal grate, was even more pronounced.

‘How very sad for you, my dear Mr. Parker. You are in love with Karla, of course. That’s how she got you to do this little job of work for her.’

‘I assure you -’

‘No, Mr. Parker, I assure you. Oh, it may be true that my Lisa’s father is pining for his daughter, and that he has the power to pull some strings. But it was Karla who talked you into this-of that, I’m quite sure. I know my dear Karla, and I know her ways. Don’t think for a moment that she will ever love you in return, or keep any of her promises to you, or that anything but sorrow will come of the love you feel. She will never love you. I tell you this out of friendship, Mr. Parker. This is a little gift for you.’

‘With respect,’ I said, through clenched teeth, ‘we’re here to talk about Lisa Carter.’

‘Of course. If I let my Lisa go with you, where will she live?’

‘I… I’m not sure.’

‘You’re not sure?’

‘No, I…’

‘She will live at -’ Karla began.

‘Shut up, Karla!’ Madame Zhou snapped. ‘I asked Parker.’

‘I don’t know where she will live,’ I answered, as firmly as I could. ‘I think that’s up to her.’