"I'll tell you what I think!" he said. "If my girlfriend dressed up her cat like Santa Claus - with a white fur bib - I'd consider it grounds for murder! . . . No! In any marriage there are periodic disagreements, but to start a lifelong union with a built-in disagreement like theirs would be insanity. She's an ailurophile; he's an ailurophobe. Koko knew it or he wouldn't have gone airborne! I tried to pass it off as a catly game, but Koko is no fool. . . . Sorry to be on my soapbox."
Dundee, who had been courting customers on the selling floor, came running to enjoy the fun.
"I hope my lecture didn't go out over the loudspeakers," Qwilleran said. "What I'm trying to say is this: The only thing Harvey and Clarissa have in common is skiing and I say their so-called engagement was all a pose, on Harvey's part - planned to mislead Doris and Nathan and sew up the inheritance. . . . No matter, the plot backfired. Harvey will have to try again another year." And then he asked casually, "What's on the program at the Bird Club tonight - besides chicken potpie for dinner? I wonder how many pies you can get out of a single chicken?"
"Oh, Qwill!" she remonstrated.
"Do you mind looking after my bike while I go downstairs to see if they have anything new in the old-book department?"
The Edd Smith Place on the lower level had the usual browsers and, as usual, Lisa Compton at the cash register.
"Qwill, I was just thinking about you! We received several boxes of books from Trawnto Beach, including a book I read when I was twelve. I laughed so hard, I rolled on the floor, and my mother thought I was having convulsions. Have you ever read
"No," he said, "and frankly I've never rolled on the floor with laughter."
"You can read it aloud to the cats," Lisa said. "It's a small book, the kind Koko likes to push off the shelf - if you're telling the truth. Lyle and I have never had a cat that pushed books off the shelf, and he says it's a heinous fabrication on your part."
"He's never had a Siamese, that's his problem. . . . I'll take the book. How much? Do I get my money back if I don't roll on the floor?"
En route to the newspaper office Qwilleran and the British Silverlight received friendly toots from motorists and cheers from admiring pedestrians. One old gentleman shouted in a cracked voice: "Heigh-ho, Silver!"
In front of the Sprenkle Building, a tall stately woman of advanced age stood on the curb and waved. Qwilleran braked his bike abruptly in front of her and said, "Sorry, madam, you'll have to hail a taxi. My license doesn't permit me to transport passengers."
"Qwill, you rascal!" she cried. "You say the most outrageous things with a straight face!"
She was Maggie Sprenkle, one of the town's most active octogenarians, noted for her volunteer work in animal rescue. After her husband's death, she sold their Purple Point property and moved into the Sprenkle Building downtown in order to be closer to her volunteer activities. The ground floor was occupied by insurance and real estate firms; the upper two floors had been transformed into a Victorian palace.
Maggie asked, "Could you come upstairs for a cup of tea? I have something to discuss with you."
"After I've filed my copy at the paper."
"Come around in the rear," she said. "There's room in the back hall to park your bicycle."
In half an hour he returned and rang the bell; a buzzer admitted him and the Silverlight, and he rode to the second floor in a small elevator - all this in a hundred-year-old building with a Victorian palace upstairs. There were crystal chandeliers, plush carpet, patterned with roses, and red walls hung with large paintings in gilt frames.
When she offered him a "nice cup of tea," he said gently, "Somehow, Maggie, a nice cup of tea seems out of sync with a bicycle ride, even on a British one."
She agreed, and served Squunk water with cranberry juice.
Before sitting down at the carved marble-top table, he paid his respects to the five "ladies" from the animal shelter, who sat in five windows overlooking Main Street traffic. They had names like Florence Nightingale, Sarah Bernhardt, Louisa May Alcott, and so forth.
"How's everything at the animal shelter?" he asked.
