In Nydalen there are nine high-rise apartment buildings on top of a steep hillside. My grandmother says people have killed themselves by jumping off the cliff but she says a lot of things and even though she is my grandmother I can tell you she tells a lot of lies. Maybe that’s why Dad has such a hard time with her. She lies to me as well. She’ll call out of the blue and say there were four masked men in her apartment — she lives alone except when her cousin who lives up in the north is visiting — and that they have taken everything she owns. But when Mum goes over to see, it turns out there’s nothing missing, only some little thing my grandmother can’t find, and then when Mum helps her find it there’s no longer any talk of the four masked men.
My grandmother tells lies, everyone does, I do it too, not to mention Dad, but my grandmother is better than us in making them sound believable. She doesn’t know anything about this country, she just talks about how afraid she used to be of the people who were going to come and kill us in the night. But now she’s also grown afraid of the cold and she doesn’t dare go outside. She even thinks it’s cold in summer sometimes when it’s actually sweltering. We have to open her windows when she isn’t looking, otherwise she thinks it’s going to kill her. She can’t speak a word of Swedish and when she got ill one time we had to go in the ambulance with her and she was convinced that the doctors — who she thought looked too young — were going to kill her.
But my grandmother — her name is Nasrin — can also do things no one else can. She can tell how a person is really feeling just from looking at their face. I know, because I can go over to her place and be feeling down but smile and laugh and then she says ‘Why are you laughing when you are crying inside?’ You can’t fool her.
I got off the tram in Nydalen and it had started to snow even harder. The ground was almost totally white. Nana lives on the ground floor in the building that is the furthest away from the edge of the cliff. I walked into the stairwell where someone had scrawled ‘Terror’ on the wall and again I started wondering what I was doing there. Why wasn’t I still at home or on my way to school? But I rang the doorbell and thought maybe she’ll be happy to see me. I know she likes me, she pays almost no attention to anyone else when she comes over to our house.
