‘Listen guys. Right now it don’t matter how Kira knows this shit. Truth is we need to stop him. He is getting too close to Guilty and we are next, believe. We can’t just sit here waiting to be merked, innit.’
Ki sits down again and takes out the notebook she’s been writing in. I try and catch her eye to maybe see if I can see in her but she avoids my look.
‘Okay Curt,’ she says flipping open the book, ‘if we are doing this thing, we need to move quickly. Face is going to be at Charley Horse nightclub on Jake Street on Friday. We do it then.’
Curt nods as if she’s just said, ‘Let’s go for a burger.’
‘What just like that?’ I say amazed that this is all so simple for them.
‘Yes. Just like that. You’ve still got your gun. We go in at nine.’
I feel her being pulled away from me again. I can’t hold on to her tightly enough. She just slips through my fingers. This time though I can’t tell whether she is the one moving away or I am. She is talking at us in a way that makes this seem almost like a dream. I tune in and out until I can get a clearer signal.
‘I’ve squared it with the door staff, they’ll give me a pass in through the front. You and Curt go in through the back. I’ve arranged it so that the doors will be unlocked but pulled to. Give it a tug and you’ll be in. When you walk in, there’s a corridor and some steps leading up to the main club. It’ll be pretty dark so use your phones for light. There’s a door on the left. You wait in there. I’ll let you in when it’s time.’
Curt nods.
I’m still stunned about what I am hearing. Nothing seems real. It feels like I’ve walked in halfway through a film but a film that I was supposed to be in. It wasn’t like I had forgotten my lines, it was more like I didn’t even know I had lines. I snap out of this trance that I am in by shouting at Curt.
‘Curt are you listening to this? Ki what the hell you chatting about?’
‘This is still a surprise to you?’ she says cocking her head and squeezing bright lights out of them eyes.
Curt steps in between me and Ki as if I might do something to her.
‘Bro, what are our choices right now? I’m just about keeping Guilty out of the way of enough bullets,’ Curt says, but he can’t look at me so he’s looking at his hands.
‘Fuck,’ I say, ‘we can’t do this.’
‘Why? Why can’t we do this? We can’t not do this,’ says Ki keeping her eyes on me till I can’t look at her no more.
People talk about crossroads moments. You have probably spoken about crossroads moments, I don’t know. But whatever you have heard about them and whatever you think your crossroads moment was, truth is, that weren’t no crossroads you were at. That was more like a bend in the road or a place where the tarmac has come off. Mine, mine was a crossroads moment, right there, right then.
I don’t know whether if I had done something different maybe what happened afterwards would not have happened. If I had spoken some different words even, maybe that could have changed something. But what I remember about that day is that I could see the roads crossing in front of me. Every way I could take pointed to somewhere I didn’t want to go. They were all pointing to one hell or another hell. And these roads were the one-way kind. What I know is that if there’s at least one place in four that you want to go or could even live with going, you ain’t at no crossroads, trust me.
‘Okay,’ I say at last, ‘we do this, we do it my way.’ I look at their two faces and there’s no resistance in them so I carry on. ‘First of all I don’t know where my gun is at. I ain’t seen it since the whole Jamil-in-the-trap-house thing. Second of all, Ki, you ain’t going in no front door, you staying put here. Thirdly –’
‘No. No. No,’ says Ki. Something in her eyes shows me that she is not backing down. ‘You cannot do this without me. You will be killed. Are you hearing me? You need me there to get into the club and you need me there to call you to let you know when he’s alone. If you go walking into that club at any time and he sees you, any one of twenty guys will be queuing up to put you down.’
‘Yeah well that’s where your brain needs to catch up with mine for a change Ki, because ain’t no way no phone is going to be working in that club. No phone Ki, no need for you.’
‘Do you even know me at all?’ she says smiling out of the corner of her mouth. She goes into her handbag again and throws Curt and me each a lump of black plastic.
‘What the fuck are these?’ I say.
‘Two-way radio. Got them from the bouncers. They use one channel, we use the second.’
‘When? When did you get these?’ I say. This is all surreal still and I still haven’t caught up with her. Right then I don’t know whether I can ever catch up with her. ‘And what about a gun?’ I ask. ‘Where we supposed to get one from now?’
‘Curt,’ she then says looking over at him. He is by the window looking out on to the street, his hugeness making shadows on the floor. ‘Can you do something about a gun too?’
