His admission that, alone, his was a hopeless task was the most shocking and painful moment he could remember in his young life. It left him reeling and apathetic to the point where even Lettie had noticed.
“Not off with Lewis today?” she’d finally asked, and he’d just shaken his head mournfully. Lettie didn’t ask any more. She hoped his newly pinched features were because he’d fought with Lewis, and not because he’d got her hypothetical slag up the duff.
She hoped it was Lewis. Anything else, she didn’t have the time to care about.
Now, while the rest of the class took turns to read a page each from
For only about the millionth time in his short life, Steven wished he had someone to confide in. Not Lewis, but someone older and wiser, who could tell him where and how he’d gone wrong and how to put it right.
He cursed himself silently, hesitantly using the worst word he knew, which was “fuck.” He was a fucking idiot. Somehow his last letter had pissed Avery off to the point where he’d picked up his ball and gone home—and Steven was sharply reminded that it
But—like a rat trained to behave by the application of electric shocks—the stubbornness was instantly curtailed by the horror of possibly never knowing. The jolt was so intense that his whole body spasmed and his wrist jerked against his desk with a loud, painful bang, propelling him back into the classroom with dizzying speed.
“Lamb, you bloody spazmoid!”
Everyone laughed except Mrs. O’Leary, who admonished the hoodie weakly—too afraid of failing to eject him from her class to even attempt it. Instead she demanded that he read the next page and the boy glowered and started to stumble painfully through the text.
Steven sighed, and wiped a sheen of sweat from his forehead. He knew he couldn’t go on alone anymore. As with the Sheepsjaw Incident, he’d glimpsed the pinprick of light at the end of the tunnel and without the help that only Avery could give him he knew he was lost in the darkness. This was not a momentary fantasy sparked by a false hope; this was real progress he’d made over months of careful planning and execution. Avery was a one-shot deal. Steven knew that if he blew this, he’d never get another chance. Either he would permanently have to stop the search that gave his life meaning, or he’d go on ad nauseam, possibly until he was old, like the tattered old man who dug about in other people’s rubbish—but with Uncle Jude’s rusty spade his companion instead of a stolen Tesco trolley.
Steven sighed as he realized he had no choice.
He was not a boy who had ever had much to take pride in, so swallowing a bit of pride now would be sour, but not impossible.
Just like Uncle Jude, he’d worked out what he wanted and the only way he knew how to get it.
Now—just like Davey—he’d have to be Frankenstein’s friend.
Chapter 17
ARNOLD AVERY LIKED TO THINK OF THE BENCHES HE MADE AS HIS tickets to freedom.
From the first day of his incarceration, Avery had had a single goal in mind, and that was to be released as soon as was legally possible.
Life did not mean life anymore. The petulant cry of
But by the time he’d reached Heavitree, he had already determined to be a model prisoner so that he could get out while he still had hair and teeth to speak of. While he was still young enough to enjoy himself.
In whatever way he saw fit.
Anyway …
Model prisoners wanted to be rehabilitated, so Avery had signed up for countless classes, workshops, and courses over the years. He now had assorted diplomas, a GCSE in maths, A-levels in English, art, and biology, a bluffer’s knowledge of psychiatry, and a certificate of competence in first aid.