— I mean who cares about this other crap these boneless futures and debuntures and all that crap but you better not shit around with the Army boy.
— That’s how much you know, move your…
— You don’t call picnic forks shitting around with the U S Army boy they get some wise guy that writes to them about picnic forks you think that’s what they do at the Army go for picnics?
— How do I know what they do at the Army look move your elbow, I got it right out of that spot bid catalogue I traded off you to send in for where the Navy got all these new plastic ones so they like spot bid these here wooden surplus ones real cheap for anybody that wants, so this here business opportunities thing the Army’s putting out all these here contracts where one of them’s picnic forks so…
— What a bunch of crap boy, if the Army wants them so much why don’t they just go buy them off the Navy why should they want you in the middle of it.
— How do I know that’s just how you do it move your elbow will you? Let me get this here envelope out…
— Yeah well you better watch out boy they’ll the both of them boot your ass when they find out I mean look at this, this here Major Sheets Procurement Officer you think he’s going to believe some letter he gets with a footprint all over it? Forks, picnic, wooden, nine thousand gr I never saw such crap, what’s gr supposed to be.
— How do I know it’s probably green, you just copy off how the Navy says it and say that to the Army is it my fault if they all talk backwards there…? he blew at the envelope and then wiped at Defense SurplUs SAles Office, Fleet Station SanD iego Cal with his sleeve.
— Look at that boy even if it gets there you think they’re even going to open it?
— They have to, what do you think they just open what they want? Besides what do they care what it looks like, I mean you think Mary Lou honey gives a shit if there’s this footmark on the envelope if money’s in it?
— Okay but how come you got enough to buy nine thousand wooden gr forks off them anyway, you…
— Because that’s not what you do you just send this here percent, you make this here bid and send them this here percent of…
— Okay where you getting the rest of it then.
— Off the bank… he licked and pounded an envelope, — where do you think.
— What like you walk in and say Mister Whiteback I just need some money to buy this bunch of wooden gr pic…
— I wouldn’t borrow off him boy you know what they do there? Like they say they pay this lousy four and a half percent on savings what those cheap shits never tell you they pay it on your lowest balance the whole quarter so you put like this thousand dollars in for awhile then you take out like nine fifty so you get like a fourth of this lousy four and a half percent of like fifty dollars while they been out loaning around this here thousand all the time it was…
— So what you think they’re going to loan it to you? Just because you get a free clock off some bank at Nevada boy you walk in there they won’t loan you shit wait what’s that hey, give it here…
— Deluxe portable vibrator can be taken anywhere in pocket or purse for portable pleasure, a perfect gift for…
— Can I help it if they just sent me it?
— They just sent you this too then, here. Here comes another first in the marital relations field, the vibropenis…
— Okay come on hey…
— Look I’m trying to put all your crap over here and you keep getting it mixed up with mine again that eagle thing, right under there with the eagle on give it here…
— What this? What’s…
— Give it here.
— What is it some more debunture crap? What’s this here thousand in the corner shares?
— Dollars boy that’s how much you know, it’s this here bond.
— What you paid a thousand dollars for a bond? I bet boy…
— That’s the whole thing you get them real cheap because they owe all this here interest.
— Who does, they owe who.
— Me, this here Eagle Mills they owe me.
— A thousand dollars?
— Plus all this here interest.
— I bet boy let’s see, look, look they don’t owe you shit look, it says right here Eagle Mills hereinafter called the Company, a corporation of the states of New York and…
— Come on give it here.
— No look it says it right here look, for value received hereby promises to pay to Selma Krupskaya or registered assigns at its office in Union Falls there, see? They owe it to this here Selma crap whatever her name is they don’t owe you shit.
— That’s how much you know look on the back, no down here where it’s stamped, there’s my name where I’m this here registered assign see? So what they owed this here Selma now they owe it to me.
— Try and get it look it’s stamped all over the place, somebody just wrote your name on so you’re this here registered asshole you mean who’s going to believe you paid any thousand dollars for it.
— Who said I did, like that’s the whole thing where they didn’t pay this here interest all this time so you get to buy them for like seven or eight cents for the dollar I’m getting this whole bunch of them boy, then you’ll…
— With what.
