Damon rolled his eyes and shook his head in Cole’s direction. “Look, if I had pulled this kind of lame ass stunt with Serena, I would have never heard the end of it from you. You’d sit there and remind me of how you once walked away from a woman and that it was the worst mistake of your life and that I shouldn’t do the same. Come to think of it, we had this very conversation about three weeks ago where you admitted that leaving Ren was the absolute worst thing you’d ever done. So what would possess you to do it all over again? Are you a masochist or are you just that stupid?”
Micah chortled and choked on his beer before setting the bottle down on the table. “He’s got you there.”
“Swear to God, if we weren’t in a public place …” Cole bit out.
“Not sure Cattleman’s serves as a civilized place,” Damon said. “I’ve never quite seen the appeal myself, so by all means, act as though we aren’t in a public setting.”
“Ya know, Cole is a rich son of a bitch too but he never acts like Cattleman’s is beneath his pampered palette,” Micah drawled. “You just don’t like it because the girls have their nights out with Drew the bartender here.”
Damon sent him a quelling glance. “There is no price tag on taste.”
“How is Serena?” Cole asked.
He desperately wanted to change the subject. Talking about Ren made the pit in his stomach grow larger. He hadn’t slept in nights. Every time he closed his eyes, it felt like he was hurling over the edge of an abyss with no way to catch himself. That was what every day without Ren was like. Hell, it was dramatic, but he was fucked and he damn well knew it.
“She’s fine. Growing more restless by the day. Her doctor thinks that perhaps her due date was miscalculated and that she’ll deliver sooner. She’s scheduled to have a sonogram this week so more accurate measurements can be taken.”
“And how are you taking this news, Daddy?” Micah asked.
“It scares me shitless,” Damon admitted. “I’m not prepared for this. I’m supposed to be the strong and in control one and it’s Serena who is constantly having to calm and reassure me. It’s damn embarrassing. The idea of something happening to Serena terrifies me.”
Cole could understand that because the idea of Ren being hurt paralyzed him and made his blood run cold. An uneasy feeling settled into his stomach. Was she okay now? Was she happy? He hadn’t ensured anything before he’d let her leave with Lucas. Ren had feared that Lucas was moving on and no longer interested in her. Cole had never ever gotten that from the other man but Ren knew him better. Had he only arrived to take Ren because his ego dictated such? What if he’d discarded Ren? What if she was out there alone?
He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. He could call Lucas, but would Lucas be truthful with him if he had tossed Ren out? Would Ren even know how to contact Cole if she was out there on her own? Would she want to?
“I’m an idiot,” he said in disgust.
Micah sighed in exasperation. “Have Damon and I not been saying this for the last half hour? What made you see the light now?”
Cole stood and tossed down a bill for his drinks. “I’ve got to go. Damon, please keep me informed of Serena’s progress. I’ll want to know when she goes into labor.”
Damon turned a little green at the mention of labor but nodded.
“Good luck, man,” Micah said, his eye serious. “I hope this means you aren’t going to sit back and let her walk out of your life.”
Cole grimaced as he pushed his chair back in. “I may not have a choice.”
“There’s always a choice,” Damon said. “It’s what you do with that choice that matters.”
“I really can’t stomach you when you get all philosophical,” Cole growled. “I’ll see you two later. Much later.”
Micah chuckled as Cole strode toward the door.
The cold air hit him in the face as did the heavy mist in the air. It was a rotten night to be out but an even worse night to be home alone with only his regrets for company.
If Ren were with him, they’d spend the evening in front of the fire and then she’d go down on her knees, her hair shimmering in the glow of the flames while he slid into her mouth.
Hell, who was he kidding? If he had any chance of being with Ren tonight, he’d be on his damn knees in front of her begging for another chance.
He drove home, unsure of what he was going to do or if he’d do anything at all. All he knew was that his demons were beating inside his head. Relentless and vicious. And they were all screaming at him that he’d been wrong. Again.
He was tired. He hadn’t slept in nights. But when he pulled into his driveway and rounded the bend to see Lucas’s silver Mercedes parked in front, his pulse bolted up and a shot of adrenaline rocketed through his veins.
Instead of continuing on to his garage, he pulled up behind Lucas’s car and it was then he saw Lucas standing outside the driver’s side door, hands shoved into his pockets.
