“Tim, don’t say that.” she pleaded, “I talked to Claire after you went to sleep. You know, she and Aaron noticed how you never say it back anymore when they tell you they love you. And, believe it or not, it hurts them a lot when they see how much damage they caused. They realize how much they hurt you. I told them we need to take this slow, respect your pace, and take what you offer, but I think it’s...”
“Wait. Whatever happened to ‘Please, just let her hold you for a while. She needs this right now’?” I interrupted, repeating her words from just a few hours ago, “Why do you keep asking me to do shit for them? Why is fixing what they broke on me?”
“It’s not. It’s on us, and we know it. I just also know that you really want your family back. Why else did you try to make John understand what happened with us, when you drove to the office together, if not to give us a chance to fix it?”
It was true. That was the exact reason why I had tried to make John understand what was happening in this family. But not necessarily to fix their relationship with me, but rather so they can fix their shit before Maggie and Ava suffer from the long-term consequences.
“Did it work?” I asked her in a subdued voice.
“Yes.” she smiled, “He was ... quite shocked about what you told him, and was seriously concerned after mulling it over. So, I take it we do have a chance to get you back?”
“Did Claire tell you that we...?” I asked carefully, without actually saying what I was asking.
“Yes. Ava too, by the way. If what she told us was true, and the way she looked and walked suggests it was, I’m impressed, my dear Nephew.” she laughed.
“You know...” I paused, looking at my hands, feeling embarrassed about it but, at the same time, also feeling the need to make her understand. “The best part about the night with Claire was the way she held me afterwards. The way you all behaved after Thanksgiving also made me think we could work on this. But
“Like what?” she asked, sounding confused. Which ticked me off again.
“Oh, well, let me think.” I half called out, while throwing my hands in the air. “How about Ava presenting me a birthday gift, and then it turns out to be a cruel joke. How about you and John realizing how bad our relationship had gotten, and then accepting it as the new normal. Granny and Gramps proclaiming how important it is we fix our relationship, right before they fuck off on another cruiseship for a year. Aaron protested how dangerous my plan was, but then readily agrees to everything I’d get thrown my way, as long as it keeps fucking Logan out of danger. Or how about me thinking that Claire and Ava coming onto me could mean that they finally accept me, just to now be told how utterly meaningless a gesture that is for you all. Which, by the way, is a real nut shot if you consider how you all excluded me from the family orgies for years, even though it’s apparently the same for you as brewing coffee! Should I fucking continue!?”
“Okay...” she conceded with an embarrassed look, but I was not even close to being done.
“And all of that happened after you all gave so little of a shit about me, you didn’t even notice that your underaged son, brother, and nephew was gone for a week! I got fucking trust issues here, Danielle, and now you’re asking me to just accept your word on how you all made a mental One-Eighty? Even if I could believe you ... After last week, I’m not even sure if I wanted to anymore.”
“Okay! You’re right. Everything you just said is true. We’ve got to prove ourselves. And we want to! Just tell me you’ll
Sure, I wished I had a family. Ever since I saw them on Ava’s sixteenth birthday, the way they cared for her was all I wanted for myself as well. But did I still care about that now? After those past years, did I still care for them? And more importantly, even if this was their genuine attempt to fix it, and not just a guilt trip like I feared, would they still want to mend our relationship if they knew what I’ve done?
“You know I killed those men, right?” I said quietly, causing her to jerk away from me in shocked surprise.
“WHAT!?”
“You weren’t there when those three guys came for us in that parking lot.” I explained, my voice just as low as when my initial confession slipped out, and I was still unable to look at her. “Bill told me how they normally handled debtors who wouldn’t or couldn’t pay them. They tried to shoot me and managed to stab me. They were prepared to kill us, but they actually came to take you, Maggie, Claire and Ava back to Austin with them. To clear Logan’s debt, they would’ve tried to blackmail you all into making porn. And if that wouldn’t work, they would’ve drugged you, dragged you in front of a camera, and filmed as each of you got raped by the five of them, creating as much videomaterial as possible to sell.”
